I took me a lot of time (honestly a lot more time than one should need) to think about what my first blog post would be about. I think the hardest part about starting this blog for me was the unknown. Will anyone like this post? Is this content interesting? Heck, will anyone even click on the link to my blog and take the time out of their already busy day to read this random gal’s thoughts? Well if you’re reading this right now, thank you. Thank you because you have already helped me overcome one of my fears about starting a blog…
Next came, hmm… what should I write about? Should I explain to everyone why I am doing this, should I defend myself for wanting to create this blog or grow my Instagram? Defend my paranoia that everyone probably thinks I am self centered or whateverrrr. But then I said, & for lack of better words, fuck that! I do not need to explain myself or defend myself to anyone! This is my space, my place to open up and create. A place to be vulnerable, and damn it if you know me, you know this is not easy for me, haha.
But here we are, so I figured I would give you a little introduction about me and where I am at in this season in my life. I haven’t been in the best place lately, but writing about it can only help me move through it, so here it is. So my name is Julz (short for Julia), I am 23 years old, I am engaged to an amazing man (no, we don’t know when we are getting married yet), we just bought our first home together, we share this home with our lovely pup, Peyton, and two weeks ago I quit my job. YEP, I have a house, a wedding to plan and pay for, a dog to feed (who eats a lot I might add) and I. quit. my. damn. job. And I quit it unapologetically.
Call me irresponsible, call me selfish, tell me I am not doing what is best for my family. You can tell me anything you want, but you can also click that little red button with an ‘X’ in the middle of it on the top of your screen. Cause quitting this job was everything I knew I needed. I was in an environment I felt trapped in. Nobody really prepares you for what hits you after you graduate college. I remember waking up one morning not too long ago and trying to rationalize going to work. Telling myself, OK Julz, only 3 more days till the weekend, only 2 more weeks till we go away for a few days, only a few months till the holidays and we will have a string of days off. And then I was like WTF? Why am I counting down my life like its pages to rip off a calendar. I am BLESSED, I am abundantly blessed by God with a loving family, a wonderful support system, and a HELL OF A MAN that will walk to the end of the earth for me. So screw you, Julz for counting down these days.
So, I got online and started researching some odd jobs that could hold me over here and there until I was able to focus and figure out what I wanted to do. Had a pretty great one lined up, then they suddenly pulled the rug out from under my feet. It’s funny right, how people can expect so much of you but will have no remorse for screwing with your livelihood? But that’s okay. Everything does not happen for a reason. That is something I have learned, (thank you Rachel Hollis, ma girl). Everything does not happen for a reason but there IS an explanation. So I quit my job, and here I am unemployed, trying to figure out my next move as bills add up and responsibilities continue to exist. But I will make it. I will pour myself into my passions. I will continue to work hard everyday. I will continue to work hard FOR MYSELF. And I will discover what I am meant to do, and do what I need to do to support myself and my family. My home. My forever.
Because merely existing each and every day, going through the motions… it just ain’t for me, girl (or guy). And I wont apologize for that. I was meant for more. So are you.